Changing your mindset with positive self-talk
Having a positive mindset can carry over into all aspects of your life and, also, help to relieve unwanted stress. It can create better performance, better immune function, greater life satisfaction, and even support better relationships.
Before you up and change the way you think, you need to be aware of and identify your negative self-talk and emotions.
Things that fall into this category would include:
-Blaming yourself for everything.
-Thinking you are not good enough.
-Ignoring the positives in life.
-Always expecting the worst and having an all good or all bad mindset.
-Not accepting a middle ground.
This includes negative thoughts about your body, the way you parent, the way you love your spouse, your performance, and your overall outlook on life.
Once you recognize these negative emotions and thoughts, you can begin to work on changing them into positives and opportunities.
When you recognize negative self-talk and emotions, you can begin to make changes and develop skills to flip your thoughts. Ways to do this include looking at your actions as things that you GET to do rather than have to do.
You get to workout.
You get to make dinner for your family.
You have a job and get to go to work.
Try to focus on things that you have control over and let go of the things that are out of your control. Look at new experiences as opportunities, to grow, to develop, to meet new people, and to be open to change. You also have the opportunity to say no to things that don’t suit you, your goals, or your family.
One thing to remember, though, is that you cannot control other people’s reactions or judgments towards your decisions. You will NEVER be able to please everyone! Take these opinions, acknowledge them then let them go. These are their opinions and people’s opinions are not facts.
Positive self-talk, just like any other habit, takes time to develop and master but let's look at how you can start to implement these into your daily life.
You begin by identifying the negative self-talk traps; scenarios, situations, and people that create self-doubt, insecurities, anxiety and negative thoughts.
Being able to pinpoint what these are can help you anticipate, prepare, or avoid these experiences.
When you are at these events or around these people, take time to pause and evaluate your self-talk, is it becoming negative, how can you turn it around? You can remove yourself from the situation, change the subject, throw out a positive comment, or maybe even call the other person out.
Also, if you can find humor in things, laughter can help alleviate stress and tension.
When making plans, try to surround yourself with positive, uplifting, caring people. Whether you notice it or not, you can absorb and mirror the energy and outlook of the people you surround yourself with. When you're alone, give yourself positive affirmations, compliment yourself, and use positive words when describing yourself.
You can also begin to practice gratitude, think about the things you are thankful and grateful for. Be accepting and optimistic, you may not be where you want to be but accept the progress you have made and be optimistic about where your journey may take you. Write down the things you are grateful for each day.
We all deal with stress, negativity, and undesirable situations. It is our reaction to these things that determine the outcomes or our experience. Learning to be aware of our negative thoughts and self-talk is the best way to begin to change how we think and feel about ourselves.
Start small and begin to look for the positives, whether people or places, seek out the things that make you happy, and lift you up.